Me Old?

[Francis Blake]

I'm 70 and still as good as ever, oh except for bad knees oh yeah and a bad arm and my back is no good.and then theres the memory----oh well I guess there is always someone else worse off. :wacky:

 

[Northstar T]

My dad tells the story: He was taking my older sister out to dinner a few years ago at chuckwagon. as they went through the cashier line the checker looked at my sister and inquired "55 gets you our senior price. are you 55?" she acknoledges that she is and they go in to eat. during dinner my dad is more quiet than usual, so my sister askes if he's feeling all right. he replies "DANG...., you know you're old when your kids are senior citizens".
I'll be 60 in April, but it's comforting to see my dad still going strong at 88. makes me feel like a kid

Russ

 

[spike]

I'm 53, my wife bought me some Ginko Biloba.....I keep forgetting to take it!

In the words of an elderly Frank Sinatra " I can't remember when I started forgettin'"

 

[Chief-T]

I'm 70 and still as good as ever, oh except for bad knees oh yeah and a bad arm and my back is no good.and then theres the memory----oh well I guess there is always someone else worse off.

I'm not as good as I once was but I'm as good once as I ever was. LOL

 

[LumenAl]

Bruce... That was some funny sh#t... but the one about the cookies for the funeral... that made me laugh out loud!

 

[VegasBruce]

Thanks Al. How you been? Long time no see.

 

[gfigms]

How many do you remember?
Head lights dimmer switches on the floor.
Ignition switches on the dashboard.
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.

Older Than Dirt Quiz :
Count all the ones that you remember not the ones you were told about.
Ratings at the bottom.

1.Candy cigarettes
2.Coffee shops with tableside juke boxes
3.Home milk delivery in glass bottles
4. Party lines on the telephone
5.Newsreels before the movie
6.TV test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels [if you were fortunate])
7.Peashooters
8. Howdy Doody
9. 45 RPM records
10.Hi-fi's
11. Metal ice trays with lever
12. Blue flashbulb
13.Cork popguns
14. Studebakers
15. Wash tub wringers

If you remembered 0-3 = You're still young
If you remembered 3-6 = You are getting older
If you remembered 7-10 = Don't tell your age,
If you remembered 11-15 =You're older than dirt!

 

[Telman2]

How many do you remember?
Head lights dimmer switches on the floor.
Ignition switches on the dashboard.
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.

Older Than Dirt Quiz :
Count all the ones that you remember not the ones you were told about.
Ratings at the bottom.

1.Candy cigarettes
2.Coffee shops with tableside juke boxes
3.Home milk delivery in glass bottles
4. Party lines on the telephone
5.Newsreels before the movie
6.TV test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels [if you were fortunate])
7.Peashooters
8. Howdy Doody
9. 45 RPM records
10.Hi-fi's
11. Metal ice trays with lever
12. Blue flashbulb
13.Cork popguns
14. Studebakers
15. Wash tub wringers

If you remembered 0-3 = You're still young
If you remembered 3-6 = You are getting older
If you remembered 7-10 = Don't tell your age,
If you remembered 11-15 =You're older than dirt!

I guess I'm older then dirt, in addition to all of those I also remember ......

16. The ice man that delivered the block of ice for the ice box with a horse and wagon.

 

[ellis8500]

17. Testing the TV and radio tubes at Walgreens.
18. No FM radio in a car...AM only and you had to wait for the tubes to warm up.
19. Slide rules.

 

[GizmoJoe]

Sorry guys. You don't have to be THAT old for that list. I'm a "only" 51 and I remember all of those.
But I live in the "country" and we were behind the times of you big city folk.

 

[lincolnuT]

65 years old and I still have many of those things........ now they're antiques....D*m I'm old...

 

[VegasBruce]

How many do you remember?
Head lights dimmer switches on the floor.
Ignition switches on the dashboard.
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.

I have a half dozen of those soldering irons, if i look around I think i still have a couple of the pant clips. The t has hand signals. As for the swith in dash and the dimmer switch, heres my car.

 

[VegasBruce]

My dad tells the story: He was taking my older sister out to dinner a few years ago at chuckwagon. as they went through the cashier line the checker looked at my sister and inquired "55 gets you our senior price. are you 55?" she acknoledges that she is and they go in to eat. during dinner my dad is more quiet than usual, so my sister askes if he's feeling all right. he replies "DANG...., you know you're old when your kids are senior citizens".
I'll be 60 in April, but it's comforting to see my dad still going strong at 88. makes me feel like a kid

Russ

LMDAO :rofl:

 

[Flyer]

A short while ago, I bought a Mustang Convertible.When peope said it was a mid-life crisis thing, I told them the were incorrect. I'm way to old for that, it's a second childhood thing. T-Buckets are in the same super-toy catagory too...

 

[Spanky]

Maybe that's why I feel like a kid whenever I go cruising in my 'bucket!
(But getting in and out of it reminds me that I'm a geezer!)

 

[Pasthisprime]

Me old?

$5.37

That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me. I dug into
my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to
be a Jolly Rancher.

Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the
truck to grab some change when the kid with the Emo hairdo said the harshest
thing anyone has ever said to me.

He said, "It's OK Sir. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."

I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change
hitting the counter in front of me.

"Only $4.68" he said cheerfully. I stood there stupefied.

I am 62, not even 65 yet?

A mere child!

Senior citizen?

I took my burrito and walked outside & into the truck wondering what was
wrong with Emo.

Was he blind?

As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil.

Old?

Me?

I'll show him, I thought.

I opened the door and headed back inside.

I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile.

Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of
me, like I could be that easily distracted!

What am I now? A toddler?

"Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?"

I stared with utter disdain at the keys.

I began to rationalize in my mind.

Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly! It could happen to anyone!

I turned and headed back to the truck.

I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn.

What now?

I checked my keys and tried another.

Still nothing.

That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror..

I had no purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror.

Then, a few other objects came into focus.

The car seat in the back seat.

Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard.

A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard.

Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.

Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be
leaving this nightmarish stop in my life.

That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger!

My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it
was nowhere to be found.

I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the
restaurant one final time.

There Emo stood, d***** in youth and black nail polish.

All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?"

All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here?"

At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle,
and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits.

Emo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad
came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was holding up a
drink and a bag.

His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by mistake."

I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.

She offered these kind words:

"It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this all the time."

All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40.

Yes, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius.

And no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast..

As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall.

I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket.

I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blanky.

The good news was I had successfully found my way home.

I'm only 51 also, so I'm still in my prime. I just thought it was a funny story. However I have had counter people give me a senor discount.

Good one, seeing how my screen name is actually pasthisprime, I’m 67!